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Aug 13

Dear Music

If you were a person
you'd have skin the color of the galaxy; ever-changing
hues of purple, blue, pink, salmon gold
your eyes would hold the world
any question answered the second someone looked into them;
42 would not suffice
your hair fading into oblivion
years of headbanging catching up to you

your fingers callused from playing every instrument for millenia
& yet your touch warm, inviting
you'd know how to give the best hugs
                                      the best motivation
                                      the best advice
i remember 357 days ago
what you gave me as i stared at the night sky dotted with stars
for the first time in two months i cried
i could finally feel something

i remember 7 months ago
what you have me as tears sprinted down my cheek 
not from sadness or loss, but from pride and joy
Jul 25

when the party’s over

ill call you when the party's over
walking home with tears dripping
my shoes dangling from my hand-
parallel to the ground
possibly a bruise on my heart
possibly a scar over my lips
possibly a cloth over my eyes
but my brain on high alert
ill call you when the party's over
when all the girls go home with their chosen stands
when all the polaroids fall from the sky
when all the lipstick stains vanish from necks
when im leaving 
and you're not with me
ill call you when the party's over
when ive had my fun and 
you've done god knows what with them
ill call you when the party's over
when I can't walk straight and 
my body and mind can't take any more of my abuse
ill call you
ill call you
ill call you
but my arrival
will only announce my departure. 

Jul 05

they/them/their fault

There's always someone on the wrong side 
it's their fault
They did it 
it's their problem
they don't know
why can't they be like us?
every day, we hear them
one tweet after another
one text after another
one voice shouting to drown out another 
a whirlwind of chaos;
everyone trying to be louder than their neighbor 
I'll never marry a republican 
women belong in the house
marriage is between a man and a woman
the planet isn't burning!
it's the kid's fault for being depressed
you were wearing a skirt, weren't you?
please, im on my knees
Jun 30

The Foundations of Decay

Inspired by MCR's song "The Foundations of Decay."

a man can go to war
hurt hundreds of women in the field 
set communities aflame, burning history presently, 
separating families and generations from each other
and yet he receives a medal of honor
because he won the most important battle in recent American history
and he will have a holiday named after him
and he will be remembered for his glories forever
while a woman who's a single mother
with two kids and a dad out of the picture,
less than $30k a year, working her hands to the bone
at the expense of others
covered by bleach during the day and the oil of the pole during the night
selling her body to put food on the table because
she has nothing left in her apartment that people will want
her relatives won't help because she's turned to the devil
so as she works herself to death 
Mar 22

In The Words of My Idols

To find
to find the exact words
to find the perfect words
to say less but to say more
was ideal with this project 
i dont relate to you
i dont relate to you,  no
'cause id never treat me this shitty
you made me hate this city
mother, should i run for president?
mother, should i trust the government?
im falling again
im falling again
im falling 
things i once enjoyed
jut keep me employed now
things im longing for
someday ill be bored of 
stop playing with me before i turn you to a song
stop playing with me before i turn you to a song
dont be that way
fall apart twice a day
Jan 23
poetry challenge: Teenager

à la Kurt Cobain

I wish i loved you in the 90's
we would've met running from the cops together
a punk nightclub behind us
smears of maroon and black lipstick on our collarbones
the neon green admittance stamp on the backs of our hands
fading away into nothingness-
the work of spilled beer and sweat-
maybe your lip split open in the chaos 
so when I would've kissed you the first time
it'd taste like blood and something indescribable;
a dream dropped form the top shelf
shattered into a million pieces on the hardwood floor
only broken things can fix broken things
so maybe that potential kiss would've solved the universe. 
if not the 90s, maybe the first decade of a new century
a teen's midsummer night's dream;
everyone moving
everyone screaming
the band onstage yelling something we can't hear
but we burst our lungs out anyways
you turn around, see me, and the rest would've been history

Oct 18
poetry challenge: America Now

Be a woman (letter from society)

Be a woman
don't wear baggy clothing
look attractive
don't be tempting or seducing or sexy; men can't help themselves.

Be a woman
keep your head high
speak your voice and your mind
be quiet; your opinion doesn't matter because you're a girl

Be a woman
eat salads and sandwiches and fruits 
eat everything 
you eat too much, go on a diet
omg look at her
she's so skinny
she obviously has body image issues
she doesn't love herself
why can't she be happy with her body?
i liked her before her diet
no man will want a woman that thin
she should see a doctor
something's wrong with her

Be a woman
Be the light in the room
brimming with confidence
Oct 05


I am floating in an ocean of tears
trying to not melt & fade away
become one with everyone else
when a boat comes along
i know they're different
i know they're not meant to be ere
& yet they are
scientist at heart; curiosity my drug
i float
let the tears part & give way for me
& for a moment
i am happy 
because maybe just this once
the ship won't steer away.
we move closer and closer
& then i see it
the slight shift in direction
they've seen my danger beneath the surface;
they don't want me anymore.
i stop moving
but it's too late
& we crash
another boat at the bottom of the sea
another time i shatter into pieces
but sooner or later
i freeze myself back together
& i spot another ship.
at some point
you'd think I'd know better.

Loving me is suicide
     -Nessa Barrett, "la di die"